The stories behind the names.
My first volleyball team in Cedar Rapids was "Cal's All Stars".
My friend Keith signed up our team and picked the name as a spin from
our mud volleyball team at the University of Iowa which was named
Keith's All Stars. Here's the other team names in alphabetical order.
Air Maile. Maile was the last name of a girl on my team.
Alaskan Anchors. A girl on our team went to Alaska on a trip
and she also happens to dig her feet in the sand when at Volley's.
The Avengers. The old IPTV spy duo show. Not the super hero team.
Back To Chicago. Patti keeps saying how she is moving back to Chicago any day now.
Bad Ravioli. I tried making some ravioli from scratch for Gina and Patti
but they turned out like meat-filled poptarts.
The Big Dymkowski. Dymkowski is the maiden name of a gal that was on the team,
but she didn't play this session because she got pregnant. True story.
Blond Corks. A teammate named Corkery that sometimes bleaches her hair.
Black Staplers. I was sitting at my desk at work filling out the YMCA volleyball form.
I did not have a name yet. I wanted something dark and sinister.
I saw a black stapler on my desk. Stapler made me think of the phrase:
"I'm the hammer; you're the nail."
Blue It. The session before we lost to the first place team and got second.
Boom Boom Boom. From that wonderful song you hear at the meat-market bars.
"Boom, boom, boom, let's go back to my room."
Brad's Back. Brad returned to our team after a brief hiatus.
Brick House. In reference to Gina's house, and her body.
Bum Lookers. This is what you are if you like to look at girls' rear ends.
Bump, Set, Twerk. A few months after Miley Cyrus made twerking famous.
Cals Court of Law. When there are disputes over volleyball rules
then Cal has to write a legal opinion on the matter.
Carla's Bargain Hunters. Carla was a woman on our team.
I caught her shopping at a Salvation Army Good Will store one day.
Chilean Miners. Global story of miners rescued from a deep mine in Chile.
Cool Go Crazy. From the best musical ever, West Side Story.
The scene in the garage at the end of the play/movie.
The music and dancing is great. The dancers yell this at one point.
Da Bears. There were 3 Chicago Bears' fans on that team.
Dare To Be Towed. Holly is always afraid to park outside
the YMCA in a non-parking spot.
Dean Machine. 2004 Democratic Front Runner Howard Dean
and his tirade after losing the Iowa Primary.
Downton Abbey. The summer of 2013 I named every team after an IPTV show.
Double AA Women. The three gals on the team were Anna, Lara, and Hannah.
The Dragons. Patti was back from Chicago to watch her brother's team
play in the Iowa HS girls state tournament. Her brother coaches the Johnston Dragons.
Dude! From that funny Bud Light commercial. It's the only word said in the commercial.
Four and Half Feet. How much water I got on the first floor of my house
from the Great 2008 Flood.
Fours Sucked. The session before we played 4x4 and got creamed every game.
Full Nine Yards. Keith Abkes poured alot of concrete that summer for his garage.
Get On With It. A line from Monty Python.
Gentle Caress of a Summer Breeze. Probably the greatest line from television.
The Simpson's character Martin gets his shorts ripped off
after his backyard pool explodes. Standing there naked he utters,
"Oh, the gentle caress of a summer breeze."
Get It In. My teammates can't get their serves in. I can't get my Volley's sign-up form in on time either.
Gilder Soldiers. Those who were framed for the kidnapping of Princess Buttercup in Princess Bride.
Gina's Crack Unit. I wanted to name a team after one of Gina's body parts.
Godzilla. Japan had been ravaged by earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear meltdown.
Go Indians. A Volley's team that was entirely comprised of Marion High School graduates.
Hooville Raiders. A spin on the Oakland Raiders.
I pretend to be the Grinch now and then.
It's a Hot One. It was a warm Fall day when I signed up our Y team.
I'm Too Much. "I'm Mr. Heat Miser, I'm Mr. Sun. I'm Mr. Heat Miser, a 101.
I'm Mr. Heat Miser, whatever I touch, melts in my clutch! I'm too much."
"I'm Mr. Ice Miser, I'm Mr. Snow. I'm Mr. Ice Miser, a 100 below.
I'm Mr. Ice Miser, whatever I touch, freezes in my clutch! I'm too much."
Junior's Grades. From a Van Halen song, "Have you seen junior's grades".
Katie's Curves. Sad story. I picked the name because Phil left our team
and at one time he and his wife were gonna buy a Curves-For-Women franchise.
A few weeks after signing up the team I learned he was getting a divorce.
Later Tareek. After 11 years, Gina finally broke up with her Sudanese boyfriend, Tariq. She threw her f--ing life away.
Legion of Doom. The nemesis of the Super Friends was Lex Luthor,
Joker, Solamun Grundy, Riddler, Cheeta, Mantis, Sinestro, etc.
Little Lost. Supposed to be Little Lost Shitzu, because Gina took in (stole)
a small dog she found in her heighborhood.
LOST. The final season of the hit ABC show was wrapping up.
Lucky Number 13. I signed the team up on the 13th.
Make Em Bounce. Even with a tight sports bra, I like to see female
volleyball players make them bounce.
Michael Scott Paper Co. The last season of The Office with Steve Carrell.
Monkey Boys. The great cult classic movie Buckaroo Bonzai had this line.
A Petagon general is complaining to an alien about the filthy condition
of the alien's secret head quarters,
"This place is a damn pig sty. Don't you have any pride?"
The alien grabs him by the tie and lifts him off the ground and says,
"This isn't my god-damn planet, you understand, monkey boy?"
Mr. Peanut. The name of the dog the Little Lost Shitzu.
Murphy's Law. A woman with that last name was kicked off my team.
New Mexico Women's Soccer. It was all over the news: video footage of
a girl from BYU pulling the ponytail of girl from NM during a college soccer game.
Nice Carry. In B league there many teams that use illegal hits.
These are called lifts or carries. If another team did one I'd ask,
"What's our team name?" A teammate would reply, "Nice Carry."
Not Too Late. The session before I didn't sign up at Volleys soon enough
and we got stuck at a later time than I wanted.
Off Too Much. A play on words. All the other teams wanted to beat off too much.
Odd Couple. In memory of Tony Randall who died that summer.
Oh, fudge. I try not to use profanities.
I say this in place of the F word. I got it from the movie "A Christmas Story".
Oh so mad. When I signed up this team at the Y in late summer of 2005
my Volleys team had just went from 1st to 3rd and I wasn't happy about it.
Oklahoma. Three reasons for this name.
1. On an episode of Jackass this guy was getting abused by a dominatrix,
his codeword for the abuse getting too strenuous was Oklahoma.
2. Hugh Jackman, Wolverine in X-Men movie, was starring in Oklahoma musical on IPTV.
3. OU football team was ranked #1 at the time; but then they lost in the
Big 12 championship the week before our volleyball season started.
On Fire. If you play well in the video game NBA Jam the game announcer screams, "He's on Fire!"
PH Good Day. The radio legend died the month before. He always ended his show with "Paul Harvey ... (long pause) ... Good Day."
Perfect Season. I didn't have a bad serve from Jan 2003 to May 2003.
Playoffs YKM: "Playoffs? don't talk to me about Playoffs! Playoffs? You kidding me?" rant by NFL coach Jim Mora.
Portside Burners. Brad had this goofy cartoon he made in high school
called Portside. Years later Brad would buy a CD-Rom writer device
(called burner by techies) and I had another volleyball team name.
Quitten Time. That spring I quit my fulltime (desk job) position at Kirkwood.
R U Being Served. An old IPTV show I watch.
Sam's Free Meat. This is what Alice (Brady Bunch) got all the time
from her butcher boyfriend.
Roller Dogs. I think I got this from a nickname for roller-blade daredevils,
or the from the hotdogs at convenience stores.
And I've used it to describe a special volleyball hit of mine.
I hit the top of the ball, put lots of spin on it,
and if it hits the top of the net, it will spin over and drop like a rock.
Second-Hand Shorts. My teammate and old friend Chris only buys his clothes
at Salvation Army Good Will store.
See Jack Squat. This name has two meanings.
This is what JFK does in the bathroom and
it's what you see if you watch us play.
Jack squat is slang for nothing.
Shrimp Cutters. Our teammate Jeff worked at Hy Vee in the
sea food department for a while.
Snot Nose. I look for name inspiration at the exact time I am signing up the team.
That day I had a little flu.
Some Wet Sand. This is what got in my socks at Volley's.
Spike Drought. Iowa was having a drought that summer.
Still Standing. Cindy F, who fell down often,
decided she would forgo my volleyball team to train for a triathalon. Whench.
Stone Gina. Gina is afraid she'd get stoned with rocks if she ever visited Sudan.
Sweep The Leg. Famous and infamous karate move.
Sugar Bear Spazs. Most team names have an animal.
Kids with too much sugar can be spazs.
Tall Cupboards. I was right in the middle of installing my kitchen cabinets,
when I stopped and ran to the YMCA, to sign up our VB team.
Super Friends. Remember the Saturday morning cartoon?
Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Flash, and Green Lantern.
My team even had matching t-shirts that year.
Tattoo Taboo. One of the hottest girls I've had on my team was Katie C.
She had three tattoos.
Team Obama. He just won the election that November. Can you believe it?
A brother in the White House.
This Old Team. Cal bought an fixer-upper house in April 2006.
Bob Vila and Norm would be proud.
Troupe de Gufe. I ripped off another team that has been playing at the YMCA for years;
their name is Goof Troop.
Underworld Creepers. A team from the board game Blood Bowl.
Welch's Roommates. At least 3 people on the team have roomed
with Kelly Welch: myself, Gina, Katie.
When I'm Angry. Bruce Banner aka The Hulk used to say, "Don't make me angry.
You wouldn't like me, when I'm angry."
Wildfire. The ghostly song from the 1970's and the fires buring up southern California that summer. click here to listen or right-click on the link and choose "Save Target As" to download the mp3 to your pc.
Winter Is Coming. A saying/motto from the books Game of Thrones that Phil loves. HBO started a series that year.
Work That Dum Dum. Another great line from television.
Jim Henson on E! Talk Soup. From a clip of this little monkey sucking on a lolly pop.
Henson is yelling, "Yeah! Go monkey! Work that dum dum!"
I also got one of my famous volleyball cheers from Henson in "Get some!"
Worm Girls. Gina and Patti went to Costa Rica and had to take antibiotics when they got back
to rid themselves of diarrhea from stomach bacteria.
You're Fired. Donald Trump's infamous saying from his TV show "The Apprentice."
Go back to Cal's Volleyball